this is cord

Cord, my middle girl, requires lots of patience right now. And sometimes I feel like she'll continue to stretch me as she grows. I have stopped asking God for patience, ha. Not really, but on days like today, when I leave the room only to hear the baby begin to fuss and peek back in to find a 37 lb. ball of crazy laying on top of her, laughing, my first thought is "Lord, this isn't how I want to learn more patience."

But this same ball of crazy, hours later, takes off, bouncing to her bed for a nap. Stops suddenly, cuts her marble eyes back at me, purses her delicate lips and comes bounding back for a big, sloppy kiss on my cheek (little lips make the sloppiest kisses, dogs excluded here). My heart feels full and warm like a blanket fresh out of the dryer has been placed on it. 
That's my girl.

And then, minutes later, I get up frustrated because I keep wandering into the pages of an engrossing novel, only to be torn away by the squeaky noises coming from the napping room. I sigh, she is out of bed again, and she knows better, oh stars, does she know better. I feel worn, SERIOUSLY? I stop outside the door to control my frustrations and notice those same squeaky noise have a small melody about them, whimsical in a way. Peering through the crack (the door must always be cracked, per N's requests demands), I feel a great release and overwhelming love as I watch a sweet big sister singing lullabies to her dozing baby sister. The phrase about a heart bursting is a true feeling.
That's my girl.

She is clever, in a quiet way. Firm, strong-willed, and loving. She is lighthearted, and hilarious. She tends to be prone to head bonks and bruised knees. And full of kisses and snuggles. This kid, this precious daughter of God, is one exhausting little girl, and challenges me to be a better mother, daughter, sister, and friend. Also, she encourages me to take naps, because I never know when I will find crayon on the walls, unused wipes all over the floor, car titles drawn on (in marker too!), number 2 on the carpet, etc.
That's my girl.

I love you, Cord!

thankful to be your mama